STOP the holiday CHAOS! Pt. 3

Are YOU caught up in the holiday CHAOS?Holiday-stress

In the last post, we focused on the holiday stress of Presents and Gift Giving. We talked about minimizing the cost of presents and ways to minimize the amount of presents you have to purchase, as well.

Today I want to discuss the final aspect of holiday gatherings. We have talked about location, food and gifts. Now we are going to talk about people.

The third (and final) category is

Handling Family and FriendsfamilyThere are many stressful issues when it comes to the holiday season. But, in my opinion, the most stressful is the worry I place on myself trying to make sure everyone is happy and having a good time. Just in a small setting, with close family, I worry about people feeling left out, people fighting and people having fun. With large family gatherings, such as are common during the holiday season, the stress of trying to create and maintain a joyous atmosphere can be a mountain of a task. But usually, for me at least, it’s more of a mole hill and I made into a mountain. So, let’s discuss some activities and tips you may be able to use in order to keep your family happy and you a little less worried!

The first stress I have with maintaining my people are the children. Not only do I worry about my own child, but I worry about every other kid too. You know how it is when you’re a kid at a holiday party. The only good thing about these parties for kids are the food and the presents and they have to wait for both of those things. Most families, including my own, lean a lot on the kids being able to play with each other and cure the boredom. But sometimes, you can have a few kids that don’t have other kids their age or you can have shy kids who don’t warm up to each other very fast. So, here are a few tips to help handle the youngsters at your event!

My first suggestion: “Kid Rooms”

I have always found that being able to separate the kids from the adults leads to a much happier party crowd overall. But, you may be like me and not have but one large room for congregating. So, here are my tips on how to have a “Kid Room” even if you don’t actually have a room!

  1.  Utilize your kid’s rooms- If you have other kids attending the party that are close to your own children’s ages, have their rooms be the “Kid Rooms” for the one year before and after their age. Ex. Your kid is 12, so their room is for 11-13.
  2. Utilize your kid’s entire room- It might be a hassle, but you can also consider moving your child’s furniture to the garage or another bedroom to create a “Kid’s Room”
  3. Create a “Kid’s Section”- You can easily arrange the furniture in your house and or other rooms to have an area clear for kids. Using a rope, fence or some other form of “fencing” to section off the area to allow only kids into it.

My second suggestion: Games and Activities

A very easy way to ensure the children at your event are entertained is by providing options for activities and games. By having a ready source of entertaining events for the kids, you allow the kids to have a good time and you take some of the pressure off of the parents to have to be watching their child, allowing them to have a better time as well! For some great suggestions for age appropriate games try visiting:

Nick Jr: “Party games” or Kidspot.com: “Activities and Games”

Another option would be to have a holiday movie ready for the kids to watch while waiting.

My third suggestion: Kids Table

I’m not going to say this is some sort of controversial subject or anything, but there has been some debate in the parenting world about kids table vs joined table. In my opinion, if you have only small children, that may need to be monitored while eating, it would be best just to seat them at the table. In that case, as a host, you want to make sure and arrange the seating so that there doesn’t have to be any shifting in order to place parents beside their children. However, if you have a wide range of ages, I recommend the kid’s table. It allows the kids to feel a sense of independence and allows the adults to have a sane meal! lol

The other stress you have to deal with is family drama. I know, not all families are filled with drama. But when you put a lot of family together in one room, sometimes drama can be the outcome. Within the boundaries of “Family” there are often very few boundaries. This can create an atmosphere perfect for meddling, arguing and plain out fighting. If you’re lucky, you have a family with very little drama and the closeness only brings joy. But if you’re like most, myself included, things can go well or terribly wrong, depending on the preparations made and the damage control used.

My first suggestion: Have a Game Plan

If your family has a tendency to stir up drama at big occasions, you might benefit from having a sort of schedule. In no way, would I suggest a full schedule during a holiday gathering. People need to be able to mingle. But, you could easily throw in a few “activities” for adults to participate in in order to prevent any tension. Board games are a fantastic way to keep the atmosphere light and happy. For some suggestions for board games visit: Best Board Games List.  However, if your family isn’t the board game type, you could always bring out the home movies and/or photos. If you plan ahead, you could even ask guests to bring their favorite videos and/or photos. That way, the family can be entertained as well as brought closer together by remembering bonding moments.

My second suggestion: Keep it as short as people’s fuses

There aren’t really any rules, per say, about how long or short your event must last. Sometimes, the drama doesn’t really start until the novelty of seeing someone you haven’t seen in a while wears off. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family. But even with as much as we love each other and as well as we get along, if you keep us locked in one room for too long there will be some sort of drama. So, to cut down on that, have a plan to bring the party to an end, when you can see that people are becoming short fused. Also, don’t be afraid to have your event in shifts, if you happen to have people who cannot stand each other. Offer a buffet style meal with a large range of time people can stop by to visit. That way if any two people do not want to be around one another, they can split the time.

I hope the past three blogs have been able to help you with some aspect of this holiday chaos! Just remember, the reason for the season is the JOY! So don’t let the chaos steal your JOY! Keep calm, find tips and tricks that work for you and remember, you’re a Wild Mommy, you can do ANYTHING!

Until Next Time,

Wild Mommy MC

@WildMommyMC

WildMommyMC@yahoo.com

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STOP the holiday CHAOS! Pt. 2

Are YOU caught up in the holiday CHAOS?
Holiday-stress

Last time, we focused on the holiday stress of Dinner and House Preparation. We talked about ways to minimize your holiday stress when it came to cooking and house cleaning for the holidays, if you are hosting a party.

Today we are going to focus on a stress that most people must handle during the holiday season.

The second category I want to talk about is

Presents and Gift Giving

0511-1005-0201-0025_Cartoon_of_a_Woman_Tired_Out_from_Christmas_Shopping_clipart_image

Throughout the year, you often have to buy gifts for birthdays, baby showers, weddings, etc. But nothing throughout the year compares to the lengths most people go to for the holidays. Gift giving can be stressful. There is the stress of picking out the right gift, then there is the stress of finding the right price. For Moms, who end up doing most if not all of the holiday gift buying for family members, it can be very difficult indeed. So let’s discuss some ideas and tips that can help to alleviate your gift-giving stress.

The biggest stress I have when it comes to gifts and presents is my budget. If you’re smart, you will budget throughout the entire year to allow a gift budget for the holiday season. I know a few people that do this, they allot an amount of money per month to be held just for this time of year. However, if you’re like me, it’s basically a mad scramble to collect gifts, just about as soon as Thanksgiving dinner is digested. Sometimes, I don’t get down to really buying things until the first or second week of December! So, obviously, our budget isn’t exactly prepared for a large subtraction! So, over the years I have developed a few things that allow me to get by with minimal spending!

My first suggestion: Budget all year

Now, I know I just got through talking about how horrible I am about budgeting and saving. But, if you can do it, I highly recommend it. One option would be to make a list of the all of the people for which you plan to buy gifts. Then, select a price range for each person. Add up the total amount needed and divide that number by 10. Each month from January to October, you set aside that much money in a different bank account, piggy bank or wherever you keep your savings! Then by the time you reach November, you can successfully shop for all of your gifts!

If you can’t manage to save money all year long, like me, you can still plan a short-term budget. All you have to do is set a spending limit a few months ahead. Then, you can collect larger increments for fewer months. However, with this style of budgeting the best idea would be to set a standard, that each person gets a certain amount. What I tend to do, is break it down into categories: Each niece/nephew gets the same amount, each sibling gets the same amount and each parent gets the same amount. This keeps me from over spending on each person and also keeping everybody from getting envious! lol

My second suggestion: Minimize Presents

Much like the idea of assigning a certain amount of money to each person, you can easily employ a few options for minimizing how many presents are given during this time. One option is to adopt a “Kids Gifts” only idea. Meaning, the only people who get multiple gifts would be the younger people within your group. Then, for the adults you have a few options for how to limit it. You can play a gift exchange game. This year, with the adults in my family, we are doing a “White Elephant” gift exchange. To learn more about this game and others visit: “28 Ideas for exchanging gifts”  from RealSimple.com. By playing these games, not only do you minimize the cost of buying 1 gift versus 10-15, but you also get to create a new holiday tradition. One that I know, personally, can be a lot of fun! Another option would be to do a “Secret Santa”. Where everyone buys one present for one person. Though this way would have to be done in advance, it has the perk of allowing people to get more expensive gifts than they would with the games.

My third suggestion: Make it, Don’t Break it (the bank, that is)

This suggestion happens to be one that I use personally just about, if not every, year. Making your own gifts can not only save you a ton of money, but some of the best gifts I’ve ever given or received were homemade. There are so many different projects and cute things you can make for any age, male or female. A good place to look for great ideas would be Pinterest. It’s free to sign up and you can collect ideas all year long for not only gifts, but decorations and meals! Another great suggestion is taking a family photo and distributing them in homemade frames. For Family Photos, there are many options. You can easily check out any of the major photography companies, but in my opinion the best way to go is with a local photographer. Using a local photographer allows you to incorporate familiar scenery, to have a wider variety of prints and ultimately, in my opinion, a more comfortable and cozy photo. You can easily look up local photographers online. If you are near my area (Dallas, Tx), I have two photographers that I personally recommend.

AprilPintoApril Pinto with April Pinto Photography

and

JenniferPritchettJennifer Pritchett with Jennifer Pritchett Photography

Both of these photographers are especially good with children. Capturing wonderful and magical moments in nicely edited photos that will amaze you, all at decent prices! Don’t forget to mention that Wild Mommy sent you!

Using family photos as a present can easily cut down on your total budget. If you decide to frame them, you can easily purchase bulk frames online. Or you can wait until a craft store like Michael’s or Garden Ridge (Which is now: At Home) is having one of their regular frame sales. And you have options with the frames as well. You can either get bulk frames, then purchase paints and paint each frame specifically for each person and/or family. Or you can buy different and specific frames for each person and/or family.

I hope you have found some of these tips and suggestions helpful to your holiday situation! Join me next time when we talk about the third and final category: Guests. Where we will discuss ways to help handle anything a guest throws at you before, during and/or after a holiday event!

Until Next Time,

Wild Mommy MC

@WildMommyMC

WildMommyMC@yahoo.com

STOP the holiday CHAOS!

Are YOU caught up in the holiday Chaos?

Holiday-stress

The holiday season comes but once a year and for most Moms out there, it’s a good thing. While the holidays are a wonderful time that bring family together in joyous celebration, if you’re anything like me, the holiday season also brings on enough stress to be crushed under! So, this season, instead of stressing, let’s focus on some tips to

STOP the holiday CHAOS!

As much as I’d like to deny it, most of the stress I experience during the holidays has nothing to do with outside sources. What I mean by that, is that most of it comes from my anxiety over wanting the occasions to be perfect. There have been very few time that another person is the source of my holiday madness. So, the easiest way to mange that stress is to plan ahead. If you tend to freak out during the holiday season, join me over the next 2 days to see if some of these tips can save your sanity this holiday season.

The first category I want to talk about is

Dinner and House Preparation.

woman cooking and cleaningIf your plans for the holidays are to travel to another person’s home or another location, then these tips may not be necessary for you. However, if you’re like my family, though we travel for the holiday season, we may also have a small gathering for our immediate family and/or friends. And, these tips are helpful when hosting ANY event in your own home as well!

In my case, the first stress I have when hosting in my own home is cleaning. Though your house may be clean (most days, if I’m lucky, lol) and well kept, there is a special kind of clean when hosting a party. I call it “Deep Cleaned”. For me it means scrubbing base boards, washing windows, dusting things I don’t usually dust and basically scrubbing every surface of my home. When it’s holiday season, however, you usually have a lot more on your plate and cleaning seems to be the biggest and most tedious task.

My first suggestion: Hire Someone.

Don’t be shamed into thinking that hiring a local maid service to deep clean your home is not an option. I know a lot of Moms out there who are hesitant to hire someone because of the stigma of

A) Not being able to do it yourself, B) That it must mean your house is disgusting

and/or C) That you are a snob or lazy.

For one, if I had the money to hire someone to clean my house ALL of the time, I would. There is nothing wrong or lazy about allowing someone to clean your house. Plus, there are many Moms out there who are in the business of cleaning houses. That makes it a Moms helping Moms situation! But especially hiring someone to deep clean your home before you host an event is just sensible. By taking that pretty big task off of your plate, you make room for doing the things that you can’t necessarily hire someone to do. Consider it an investment and breathe easy! To help find a maid service near you try Care.com

However, I know times are hard and money is tight already, not including the holiday extras, so if you need to cut the cost, hire a kid. It could be a friend’s kid, the baby sitter or a youth from Church or the neighborhood. By hiring a kid you cut your cost, but you also allow a kid to make money for their holiday season!

My second suggestion: Ask for help.

If you’re a Mom to a child basically 5 and up, you already have one volunteer for cleaning! lol But seriously, let your child(ren) help with the cleaning. Give them a task at a time and reward them with something they will enjoy for every task completed. You can even make certain tasks that may be harder or take longer worth a larger reward. And don’t be afraid to ask your family and/or friends to help you either. Find that friend, sister, brother or cousin that wouldn’t mind rolling their sleeves up for a nice dinner and/or movie. Then you get help, plus some bonding time with the person!

The next stress that I have is with the food. Good cook or bad cook, either way, most Moms out there do not have just a TON of experience organizing, preparing, cooking and serving LARGE meals. Sure, we may cook for our family of 5-8, we may make very intricate and detailed dishes and we may have served food plenty of times. But doing all of it from top to bottom for more like 10-20 people can be a daunting task.

My first suggestion: Keep it Simple.

If you’re like me, the holiday season is the reason for new recipes, as well as old favorites and traditions. For example, one tradition/old favorite I have developed over the last couple of years are cheese balls. I began doing it one year and have since perfected 3 recipes and thought of about 15 more. So for me, every year, it’s about making something that is better than the year before as well as bringing back the favorites collected over time. But when you’re hosting an entire meal, it’s a different story. Time won’t always permit you to do ALL things bigger and better. So, keep it simple with some of your dishes. You still have specialty dishes, but make them special. Not every side needs to be an intricate affair. It can be refreshing and exciting to have simple sides, with just a few specialty dishes.

My second suggestion: Plan Ahead.

Cooking several dishes, several additions and a large hunk of meat can be overwhelming. However, there are ways you can plan ahead that can help you keep your dinner running smoothly.

For instance, prepare your table ahead of time. Set out plates, bowls, cups, utensils, etc. Have it all done before you even begin to cook, that way even if you happen to need more time on your turkey or ham, you can allow guests to sit and begin on salad, rolls or even sides. For suggestions on easy holiday food, check out “25 Tips for an easy holiday” from www.Food.com.

Another tip is to prepare as many dishes as possible a day in advance. Many dishes that are served during holiday season can be made and stored over night. Then all you have to do is put them in the oven the next day for heating. For this, I suggest buying the disposable aluminum pans. They come in just about every shape and size, most often with lids for storing and they are obviously, oven safe. And, you don’t have to clean them afterwards!

aluminum_pans

My third suggestion: Ask for Help/Hire Someone.

Now, there are two ways you can ask for help with preparing the holiday meal. One way, is to just ask a friend or family member who will be attending the party to come early and help you with the food. If you don’t have anyone that can be available, try hiring someone to be your Sous Chef. Basically, a person that can do the more tedious aspects of the cooking, like stirring and mixing. You could, again, hire a teenager you know or you could place an ad on CraigsList. There are MANY chefs and/or caterer’s that would be willing to help for a few hours for extra cash.

Hopefully, you found at least one tip that can help you eliminate some of your holiday chaos!

Join me tomorrow when we talk about the second category: Presents and Gift Giving. Where we will discuss ways to minimize spending and eliminate gift-giving stress!

Until Next Time,

Wild Mommy MC

@WildMommyMC

WildMommyMC@yahoo.com

SO what EXACTLY is a Wild Mommy?

As some of you may have read in my INTRO, being a Wild Mommy has a general and personal meaning to every mom out there! Being a Wild Mommy is having a set of ideas about parenting and living by that ideology, always complying with the standards you have decided are best for you, your partner and your child.

Here are the TOP 5 ways to be a Wild Mommy!

#5- Set up the Framework for Friendship.

You will hear a lot of argument over the idea of “being your child’s friend”. From both a professional and personal viewpoint, people have argued this topic BOTH ways. Well, much like the long-time argument over nature/nurture, I believe it comes down to a combination of BOTH viewpoints. Don’t be mistaken, in no way do I condone being your child’s friend and NOT their parent. You do nothing but destroy your child’s foundation when you step out as a parent. However, there will come a time in your child’s life, whether it be young adulthood or adulthood, when you will WANT to be friends with them, in addition to your already established parent/child relationship. It adds a depth to your relationship when you can include friend-like structure to a mature parent/child relationship. Well, in order to have that relationship when your child is GROWN, you have to lay the framework for it when they’re YOUNG. In order to do that, but maintain your parental status as disciplinarian, you have to make boundaries clear. Essentially, you want to be able to say “I am your friend, until this point” At whatever point that may be, you draw the line of where friendship turns into parenting. And just like ANY OTHER BOUNDARY your child will push it. And, believe me, this boundary is a hard one to keep. But you must. So, how do you set up the Framework For Friendship. Talk to your kid! You have no idea how much deeper my relationship is with my daughter because I talk to her. Not about just HER issues or life lessons, but I share my issues and lessons. Parents spend a lot of time hiding their emotions, problems and lessons learned from their kids. I would say the general consensus is that most parent’s feel it’s not… right… I guess, to share your problems and burdens with a child. Now, I get it, adults go through issues that should NOT be shared with children. However, I would bet MOST people have some issue or stress in their life that COULD be explained and shared with their child. Why do we hide it? I’ll never understand! Some people claim they want to teach their kids to be strong, or simply just want to BE STRONG for their kids. But the real deal here, folks, is that there is a LIFE LESSON to be learned in sharing your problems and worries! By YOU sharing with them, they in turn will continue to want to share their life problems with YOU. Don’t just share the bad either, take time to tell your kids about the adventures you have in life. Tell them when you’re excited about something, or when something BIG is going on at work. Heck, tell them all about your WORK! The more you talk to them, the more they will talk to you. and along the way you get to hear THEIR opinion of your “BIG ISSUES” which can sometimes give you a perspective you never would have considered before! And it all comes down to simply talking with your kid! Just taking time to share with them and hear their opinion. It establishes a friendship, cultivates intelligence and fortifies the idea in your child that you truly love and care for not just their basic needs, but for who they are inside.

#4- DO NOT spare the rod

Please, in no way, shape or form get me wrong. I do NOT support the abuse of children. However, I am and always will be a supporter of Corporal Punishment- a form of physical punishment that involves the deliberate infliction of pain as retribution for an offense, or for the purpose of disciplining or reforming a wrongdoer, or to deter attitudes or behavior deemed unacceptable. (Thanks Wikipedia for that definition!) There is NOTHING WRONG with spanking your child. Anyone who would like to argue this with me, may, but be warned, I have studied and researched all sides of this and my conclusion is an amount of corporal punishment can substantially help in the molding of good behavior. Spanking can help and it’s my opinion that EARLY in life, it is the BEST if not ONLY way to reach them! However, much like being their friend, there has to be a combination. You cannot always simply spank. One thing I have been praised for are the explanation skills I use with my girl. My daughter does not simply get spanked. Usually we begin by me PROMPTING her into telling me what it is that she did wrong. Doing this allows her a chance to recognize and understand what she did wrong. Ask questions like “Do you think that’s nice?” or “Is it FAIR to take someone’s toy?”. Try reversing it on them “If someone took YOUR toy how would YOU feel?”. After she has identified what she did wrong and WHY it was wrong we move onto punishment. She will be told, the punishment for what you did wrong is a spanking. When she was younger she would argue, like most kids, and my response to her arguments would be “This is not my fault, it is yours. You were told not to do [whatever], but YOU chose to do it anyways. Did you know that it was wrong? Did you know you would be spanked if you did it?” (Both answers should be yes) “Then you CHOSE to be spanked”. Really trips them out when you lay that bomb on them! After 4 years of this method, If you ask my daughter, when she’s in trouble, if she deserved her spanking, she will tell you yes. Not only that but now that she’s a little older she will tell you, when she has been caught in trouble, that she will “take her spanking like a big girl and she won’t cry because she knows it was her own fault.”. THAT is the kind of person I want to say I brought into this world! She is 4 and already takes  personal responsibility for her actions! Now, as they grow older, in my opinion, you stop the spanking and move to new consequences. This can be different for everyone! Time outs can be very helpful, my only suggestion is don’t force a time-out in a corner. Tell them to take their time out to a no-toy, no-tv area, but let them choose. In doing this, they won’t focus as much on BEING THERE as they will on WHY they are there. It’s also very important that you RE-EXPLAIN why they got in trouble after the time-out is over. Don’t let the lesson be lost! Also, don’t promise a consequence you cannot live with! There have been times when I have ALMOST used an activity I needed for a consequence. Example: If you do not stop [whatever] we will not go to the park. Well, that’s fine and dandy until bedtime rolls around and the kiddo is FULL of energy because they didn’t get to burn it off! You CAN back yourself into a disciplinarian corner! So be careful! And spank your kid when they deserve it, just help them understand the idea of deserving it.

#3- Take time to LISTEN

I know, it sounds HORRIBLY cliche. But I don’t just mean take time to have conversations, I mean take time to LISTEN. All the time, I see parents just simply OVERRUNNING their children. There is a difference between “Putting your foot down” and not even considering your child’s thoughts. The best example of a mom needing to just stop and LISTEN, that I have. One day, when I was in the restroom at work, a mom and daughter came in to use the facilities. I was grooming myself in the mirror when they came to wash their hands. The little girl told her mom she wanted to wash her own hands. But, Mom was in a hurry and that seemed like it would take too long, so she told her no and picked her up to LIFT her to the sink. As the mom was balancing the girl on one raised knee, turning on the water, soaping and rinsing the girl’s hands, the little girl was STEADY whining. About what, is entirely unsure, since her mother was disciplining OVER her perceived bad attitude. Come to find out, the way the mom was holding the little girl against the counter was HURTING her. Only after the little girl went into hysterics did the mother raise the girl’s shirt up to reveal where the counter had actually BROKEN SKIN! The entire time the mother thought the little girl was arguing about not being allowed to wash her own hands, when in reality she was trying to tell her mother that she was hurting her. Enough said? It’s the little things, moms and dads! So many times throughout their little lives they will be ignored. Even by the BEST parent. But you can truly benefit from stopping yourself from running your child’s VOICE over. Not only can you avoid issues like the previous story, but, by taking the time to LISTEN to them, we establish in them a sense of importance. They feel like their opinion and voice matter to you! As a parent, the best thing you can give your child is confidence in that voice! If they feel like that as kids, when they are adults they will feel their ideas and in fact, they, themselves are valuable. And that is a necessary feeling!

#2- Stay COOL

First, I will admit, this will always be a “work in progress” attribute for me. Keeping your cool is quite possibly the toughest part about being a parent. The deal is, other than your spouse, you can bet your child will be the single most unnerving person in your life. It isn’t just the stress of keeping the little person ALIVE, but also molding and shaping them into a GOOD person too! This means acting as a refining fire, burning all the impurities out. And as we all know, fire is dangerous and painful! Your kid will find all the ways to push all your buttons. and once they have found them, they will play them buttons like a piano! Not to mention the vast majority of little annoyances that most ADULTS know to avoid, your kid will find AMUSING! It is INEVITABLE! They will piss you off. But it’s YOUR responsibility as a parent to KEEP YOUR COOL! How you react to those little annoyances is where your child will get their cue for dealing with their life stresses. If every time your kid makes a mistake you blow up at them not only are you essentially telling them mistakes aren’t OKAY, but you are showing them that the proper way to react to a mistake or stress is to LOSE YOUR SHIT! Do you really want your kid to live life just losing their shit over everything?? NOPE! So, you have to learn to keep yours!! I’ll tell you, the biggest reason I have seen for kids bugging their parents is attention. I would bet if instead of acting huffy, you turned around and spent 5 MINUTES just concentrated on your kid, lots of those little annoyances would go away! But a lot of times we, instead, just get frustrated by their “cries for attention”. I’d love to say “here are some tips for keeping your cool” but honestly, they’re different for every different person. What calms you down may not calm me down. However, there is one SIMPLE thought you can hold in your mind when you begin to feel your cool slipping away. Take a deep breath, look at your child, your beautiful child and think “He/She is just a kid, I am the adult, so I should act as one”. If you need to walk away, do so! But don’t blow up at your kid. It isn’t their fault you cannot control your emotions at the moment, so do not punish them for it! Also, don’t punish in ANGER! It is VERY IMPORTANT THAT YOU ARE COMPLETELY COOL-HEADED WHEN YOU DISCIPLINE. If you discipline with a temper, the lesson will be lost to fear. I don’t think anyone would say they have accomplished MORE in a situation by being hot-headed! But just think of it this way, do you want the lesson to be “Don’t make Mommy mad” or “Don’t do [whatever]” ? If you approach discipline in anger, what you are establishing is that they are wrong for MAKING YOU MAD. and that is all they will see. How MAD you are at them. You won’t get the great teaching opportunities that these times can bring, you will get a kid who feels all they do is anger you. The 2nd half to “Keeping Your Cool” is apologizing when you lose it. Most parents, throughout their kids life, will teach them that when you do someone wrong, you apologize. And yet, when we blow up at our kid for interrupting or bugging us, we say it’s perfectly fine! I have seen parents blow up, heck, I have blown up many times! Now, if you were a grown adult and another grown adult spoke to you the way we sometimes blow up at our kids, you might have a real fight on your hands. I don’t get it! Snap at a coworker and you will apologize. Yell at your kid for them asking a question and you will justify. No, there’s no justification. Even if they are clearly in the wrong, blowing up isn’t how you handle it! So, when you do slip up and explode, make sure you apologize and in my opinion, explain. My daughter will benefit from hearing me say “I was wrong, I apologize. Mommy shouldn’t act like that, even when you’re misbehaving”. Children will benefit from seeing their parents being honest and having integrity that doesn’t lapse because they are children and not adults.

and lastly,

#1- Affection is the best Affirmation(Submitted by my beautiful daughter)

When I asked her for her input on my first blog “How to be a Wild Mommy” she responded that the most important thing for being a good, wild mommy is to always kiss, hug and tell your baby you love them. I felt, it deserved to be #1! There’s an epidemic happening moms and dads. Somewhere along the line, parents suddenly forgot to be affectionate with their kids. Perhaps it’s not just that. Perhaps we have been made to feel that affection isn’t appropriate. There are so many empty spaces between families right now that could be filled with a hug or kiss. Let me just say this in no way, shape or form is it WRONG for a mother or father to touch, rub, tickle, kiss, hug or pat their child. In fact, I will go so far as to say it is WRONG for you to NOT touch, rub, tickle, kiss, hug or pat your child. Physical connection is a LARGE part of our needs as a human. Your child needs to FEEL you. Infants actually BOND by being skin to skin. Everyday! Everyday you should be doing something PHYSICAL to assert your love for your child. Of course, everyday should include a mental assertion as well, but that physical contact is important! I mean, my 4 yr olds only requirement for a “Good Mom” is one that kisses, hugs and tells her she’s loved. She asked for the 3 simplest forms of PROOF of my love. A hug, A kiss and A word. That’s what they need. They need to know, in every way possible, that you are 100% crazy in love with them! and honestly, that isn’t too much to ask!

So there you have it, my TOP 5 ways to be a Wild Mommy! I hope you enjoyed my little insights and come back to see more! I thoroughly enjoyed writing my first BLOG and cannot wait to write more! Feel free to comment, like and SHARE!

Until next time…

LovePeaceUnity

Wild Mommy MC

Wildmommymc@yahoo.com

@wildmommymc on twitter

http://www.wildmommymc.com